eastern dreamin

So last night I got back from my roommate's wedding in Washington D.C. Kayla was beautiful, the wedding was beautiful, and Maryland was BEAUTIFUL.
Man, do I ever miss the East. The humidity. The trees. Gah! I love it. Yeah, Utah has its' perks, but mountains can only go so far on my scale. I miss the fall. Just look at that ^^ can anything compare?

i am a confused individual

Hate: running
Love: running with Jeremiah

Hate: corn bread, hot dogs
Love: corn dogs

Hate: people who love Wicked
Love: Wicked

Hate: change
Love: changing for the better

Hate: being wet
Love: swimming

Hate: learning German
Love: singing in German

Hate: working
Love: money

Hate: being tired
Love: being tired with Jeremiah

Hate: bananas and yogurt
Love: bananas with yogurt

Hate: cleaning
Love: A clean room

Hate: school
Love: learning

Hate: Twilight
Love: Twilight

Hate: being alone
Love: being alone with Jeremiah

The Adventures of Jerry and Danielle

The other night Jeremiah and I decided we wanted to get out of our socially intense apartment complex and just have some not so intense time to ourselves. I grabbed a deck of cards and we hopped into Jeremiah's souped up mexi-car. We parked on some mountain and were going to go on an adventure, but it was too dark and we were both wearing flip-flops(well, we were both wearing MY flip-flops, but that is a story for another day) so we opted to just sit in the car and play speed. After many failed attempts to get the cards to not slide around, we got distracted and started talking.
Now, mind you, we were on top of a dark mountain about 10 minutes away from campus, so you can imagine that there was the occasional passer-by-er. And me, being the jumpy freak I am, would jump everytime I heard/saw another human being(crazy! i know.) Of course, Jeremiah just lives to see me squirm and encourages it frequently. And this night was not an exception: there was much prodding and scaring on Jerry's part, and much screaming, jumping, hitting, and spitting on my part.
Being scared aside, the night was going well. Jerry was telling me about his mission and worm-selling business, and I was telling him about how I ruin peoples lives. Good Conversation. At some point Jeremiah's eyes get all big as he looks right past my head. "Danielle, get out of the car on my side," says Jerry.
"You're not scaring me this time! I hear people outside but I'm not scared."
"Please just get out of the car. You'll thank me."
Despite my unwillingness, I decided to trust him and get out of the car. Jerry then proceeds to tell me that he saw a mouse inside the car where the seatbelt comes out.
A Mouse. In A Car.
Being the sensitive person I am, I started to tell Jerry that he was crazy, and that he had mistaken a shadow or my hair as a rodent. After inspecting his car and playing with shadows, Jerry was convinced that he in fact was crazy, and was just seeing things.
We got our bodies back inside the warm car to again reminisce about our childhoods. Of course there was not always noise coming out of our mouths(pretty surprising, since I was part of the conversation) which made for good down time to gaze into each other's eyes, or as Nate calls it, laser beaming each other. During one of these quiet, brief moments while I was contemplating the meaning of life I heard a ..
"squeek squeek"
accompanied by a scuffling of feet!
You can imagine the chaos! We both screamed like little girls as we desperately struggled to escape the rodent infested vehicle! Of course I said sorry roughly a million times for accusing Jerry of being crazy. After a little more shuddering and such, we set out on our mission to de-mousify Jerry's mexi-car.
You should have seen this mouse!! I would venture to say that if this mouse was able to swim, it would be the Michael Phelps of all mice. It would hop and run at top speeds, he was like a flash of light!, and hence, impossible to catch. After about a half hour Jeremiah finally swept the amphibian mouse out of the car with his(aka: MY) flip-flop.

Moral of the story: If your boyfriend tells you there is a mouse in his car: Believe him.

"Sorry about the mess guys.."

On my walk to work today I noticed a police car. It just so happened that my path allowed me to be very close to said vehicle. So what did I do? What any normal U.S. citizen would do: look inside. I have never been inside a cop car, of course, so the idea intrigues me.

Now, this wasn't my first experience peeking inside a police car so I pretty much knew what to expect: the dividing grid, radar gun, steering wheel, donuts.. you know, the norm. So I immediately noticed that this car was a little different. In addition to having a divider between the back and front of the car, there was a divider between the two back seats, making 2 little human cages. But this is not what caught me off guard.

What astonished me was that these human cages were filled with crap. It looked like the back of a normal college car. There were stacks of papers, empty pop bottles, sweaters, and a halfway-buried radar gun.

I noticed that my feet had stopped moving and that my mouth was a little agape. My first thought was "is there really zero crime in Provo, which allows this officer to leave his car incapable of transporting criminals?"

Can you imagine what is going to happen when that officer finally has to put someone in the back of his car?
"Sorry it's so messy.. Let me just stick some of this in my trunk.. I swear it was clean a few days ago, I have been so busy.. Just move whatever you need to, I don't mind." And he says all this with that typical embarrassed tone that we've all heard while piling into a friend's car.

o, provo police.

I love life. Period.

A recent conversations had over a pie tin of Skyline chili dip:

Jerry: Did you know there was a woman who thought she was pregnant, but it ended up just being a tumor?
Audrey, Dave, Me: Wow, that is crazy, poor lady!!, nervous laughter
Me: I dont get it... wouldn't she have known she wasn't pregnant? I mean she would have still had her period and stuff.
Audrey: Well there are rare cases where you still have your period.
Me: Really?!?! That sucks. That is like the only reason I want to get pregnant.
Audrey: You know they have pills for that kind of stuff. You can go four months without a cycle.

awkward pause

Jerry(to Dave): So what's your favorite car?
Dave: Something with a lot of horsepower. Something really manly.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

So I've been thinking a lot lately about these things called life plans. Mostly my thoughts seem to gravitate towards the fact that I have none. Well I have plans, but not for my life. Well, I do, but they all seem so rocky right now.. and it stresses me out. For instance: I want to major in Classical Vocal Performance, but if by some miracle I do get in, I will be in school for 6 years, and that just seems like crazy-talk to me. But I do have back-up plans. I am starting a Communications major and a Sociology major.. now realistically, I should only start one.. because that is THREE majors, but no, me being me, and not having good life plans: I am doing three majors. Now someone might read this and think to themself, "That doesn't seem like the worst thing in the world, I wished I was interested in three things enough to want to major in all of them." To you that is thinking this: do not be deceived. I am completely dreading all three of these things, that is why I have three, I do not want to commit to any of them and dig myself in a deep hole.. so instead I am digging three shallow holes.. so in the end I am going to die of dehydration because I never got deep enough to get the water from my well.
It is so pathetic that I have such an easy lifestyle, and am surrounded with support and people that love me, and yet, I feel so uneasy constantly.
Gr. Life Plans.

These Is My Words

So right now I am reading a novel by Nancy E. Turner titled These Is My Words, The Diary of Sarah Agnes Prime, 1881-1901. I am finding it really interesting. It is about a young woman before the turn of the 20th century. She is a lovable character: tough, naïve, and selfless. You think she deserves only the best while witnessing her go through the worst with the best of attitudes. Many members of her family die or are killed by Indians, some of her girlfriends are raped by outlaws, and she has a loveless marriage. Before her marriage, and at the beginning of the diary, Sarah immediately falls unknowingly in love with Capt. Jack Elliot, who ardently loves her as well. This love story is what keeps me reading, I want her to realize her love so badly while she continues to mistake her love for absolute disgust. So far it is a realistic description of rough living in the late 1800s. It is a good break from the novels about rich Britains, whos only trials are developing a bad reputation.

I would highly suggest this book to anyone. It does have some disturbing parts, but I think that adds to the heart of the story telling.

Not too much of the novel is introspective, but the parts that are, are golden.
"Sometimes I feel like a tree on a hill, at the place where all the wind blows and the hail hits the hardest. All the people I love are down the side aways, sheltered under a great rock, and I am out of the fold, standing alone in the sun and the snow." p. 152

I miss naps

So, the real reason I started this blog was so i could have something else to do at work. And since I am typing, it looks like I am being productive and such. Anyway, right now I am really struggling to stay awake. I just got out of an hour meeting with my boss, and I seriously think I got a few minutes of sleep, because I don't know what we did for that whole hour... I'm pretty sure he didn't see me nod off though.. well at least I hope, I guess there is no way of knowing, unless I ask him, which could be a little risky if he didn't see it.

So tonight I plan on revisiting my artsy alter-ego. My dad gave me his brilliant camera to keep! So now I just need to find a location/subject to shoot. I am really disappointed that I don't have any access to a lab to develop the pictures, because that is where the majority of the artsy-ness takes place. O well, I guess I can just photoshop if necessary. My work has a crazy good scanner and nice new macs, so it will be fun to photoshop them. But I definitely miss the darkroom. I loved rolling the film, it is kind of an adrenaline rush to know that, at any moment, you could ruin hours of work. I also like being in the same room as all those deadly chemicals that made Dr. Miller loopy(at least I like to think it was those chemicals, I'm pretty sure he had a hippie stage though).

Sorry this post is stupid, it really was just a way to keep my eyes open.

Things are Changing

Everyone around me seems to be having crazy things happening in their life

Parents: Moved to Arizona, looking for a house
Denae/James: Preparing to take Ohio Bar, getting promotion
Devin/Emily: Pregnant
Dustin/Dantzel: Pregnant/married
Kayla: Engaged
Audrey: In Israel
Ashley: In Jerusalem

So, I'm starting to wonder if anything exciting is going to happen in my life? I did just get a new voice teacher, Ruth Christensen. I really like her, although her lessons are way expensive, which is why I love my parents!

Things I Love(currently):
-Living in Monticello
Seriously, everyone here rocks my world. All the new people just add to the fun.
-Having the room to myself
I love Audrey to death, but it's nice to just drop my clothes whenever I want.
-Opera
I go through phases
-CHICKEN FIGHTING with Jeremiah
Okay, it's like the normal chicken fighting in the pool, except replace the bottom people with basketballs. fun stuff.
-Double sided sticky tape
This is something that I love constantly, but I thought I would just reinforce the fact.
-Dresses/skirts
I don't know where they have been all my life(o yeah, my closet), but I have a newly enhanced love of feeling girly daily.
-Dave and Robb
I'm glad they are back in M22. They make me laugh.
-Sunblock
I just invested in my first bottle.. and jeeze was it pricy! But I guess $10 is a small price to avoid skin cancer.

An Explanation

The title for my blog actually came from a poem written by the genius Emily Dickinson, who I recently have began to appreciate. Audrey and I have started to analyze her poems to expand our minds, since we both have pretty mindless full-time jobs. I really love all of her poetry, and find myself deeply connected to each theme.

I think this poem can be viewed from so many differing perspectives. I think almost anyone can get something out of it.


I died for beauty, but was scarce
Adjusted in the tomb,
When one who died for truth was lain
In an adjoining room.

He questioned softly why I failed?
"For beauty," I replied.
"And I for truth,--the two are one;
We brethren are," he said.

And so, as kinsmen met a night,
We talked between the rooms.
Until the moss had reached our lips,
And covered up our names.